Rehearsal Dinners - Mountain Lake Lodge - Thoughts of Summer

The Rehearsal Dinner often marks the first time family and friends from both sides come together. So why not make it a memorable event and fun for all!

Instead of making it an extension of the wedding, consider the rehearsal dinner a chance to host an event that’s fresh and unexpected

Think about it - rehearsal dinners include a high concentration of people that love the Bride and Groom who have gathered in thier honor, and there’s no posing for photographers every minute; and the bride’s hair won’t be piled in some extremely shellacked-but-breathtaking up-do she’s never worn before and probably will never wear again.

So why not relax and, let your hair down? With very little effort, you can assemble a pre-wedding event that provides some much-needed calm before the busy storm of the wedding weekend.

Weddings have a way of ballooning into family reunions, so put the focus back on the Bride and Groom, by making it personal by adding a few creative, and very personal touches.

The Bride and Groom can start by sharing their love story with the group.  Use favorite colors, favorite meal, favorite desserts, or "their" song, as the theme of the rehearsal dinner.

Choose a location  that was meaningful to thier courtship—like that romantic bistro they went to on their first date—then share the memory with all the guests as they dine.

Present a slideshow of the Bride and Groom’s favorite photos or music.

Another option is to ask all your guests in advance (by invitation or email) to be the evening’s entertainment. Choose a friend or family member to be the emcee for the event and have those who are comfortable performing “sign up” with the emcee prior to the dinner. You may be amazed at the talent in the room as friends and family play music, sing, read touching or outrageous poems that they’ve written about the bride and groom.

Fireplace Room - Jest Gallery

How about kicking off the wedding weekend at the reehearsal dinner with a more sophisticated version of “game night.” Karaoke or murder mysteries give guests a chance to interact with each other.

Or a scavenger hunt where the last stop is the rehearsal dinner site.

Make Room for the Groom - The Bride is the star of the wedding weekend, you can re-direct the spotlight for one evening by dedicating the rehearsal dinner to the groom.

Choose a more casual venue like Riley’s Pub and Sports Bar and organize a beer tasting of the Groom's favorite local microbrews with munchies.

Or honor the groom’s love of outdoors by having a BBQ on the Patio of Riley’s Pub and Sports Bar,

 

or catered picnic at Wayfarers State Park, a dinner cruise on Flathead Lake, a fishing expedition and Fish fry on Flathead Lake Lodge, or Horsebackriding complete with chuckwagon dinner by Swan Mountain Outfitters or if the groom loves steak a Steak Dinner at Terra Steakhouse ir Bigfork Inn.

Ribeye Steak topped with Fried Onions - Terra Steakhouse

Another way to make the groom the center of attention is by serving a groom’s cake that reflects his personality by creating incredibly realistic-but-edible cakes that look like tackle boxes, a recliner complete with video game system or his favorite sport or sports team or the grooms favorite hobby.

The traditional rehearsal dinner etiquette dictates that the groom’s parents pay for the rehearsal dinner because it’s the way for the groom’s mother to show that she knows how to entertain, too.

But as more and more couples choose to pay for their own wedding or share the expenses between both families, the bottom line is you get to decide who shoulders the awesome pre-wedding party responsibility.

Remember, that whoever pays gets the last word on the rehearsal dinner details!

But don't worry about all those extra guests blowing your budget -- rehearsal dinners can be as formal or as low-key as you want (pizza party, anyone?).

Riley's Pub and Sports Bar

The traditional group to be invited to the rehearsal dinner includes the Bride and Groom, bridesmaids, groomsmen, ushers, flower girls and ring bearers with their parents, the officiant and other close family members and friends.

In Jewish tradition, it is customary for anyone invited to the wedding to be invited to the rehearsal dinner. They’ve flown out, they’ve given a gift, and they need to eat. End of story.

That said, you do have the right to invite who you want—or even hold two kinds of events. While some etiquette purists say two events makes some guests feel excluded and awkward, more and more couples are now opting to have their dinner at a swanky restaurant with the usual close-knit crew, then meet up with more friends and out-of-towners later at the restaurant’s bar for the pre-wedding toasts.

It’s all in how you word the invitations. One couple wanted to include every single wedding guest in the pre-wedding festivities, but their budget precluded it. The guests who weren’t included in the posh pre-wedding meal got invitations with a later time to join up for the rehearsal “party,” and these people never guessed that the actual dinner had already happened. They were too busy noshing on the delicious tray-passed appetizers, cocktails and desserts!

Start planning the rehearsal dinner as soon as you can make the event location reservation, at least 3-6 months in advance of the date. At three months out, couples have a good idea how many guests will be attending and they can plan a menu that doesn’t conflict with their wedding day. Consider scheduling your rehearsal dinner on a Thursday night if you’re having a Saturday wedding. Not only can this make your rehearsal dinner bill cheaper, but “everyone can party as much as they want, sleep it off on Friday, and wake up for the wonderful wedding on Saturday.

There are so many rehearsal dinner locations it’s hard to choose! Coordinators can help steer you in the right direction, but a favorite restaurant is always a good choice. Choose a place that’s close to your rehearsal site to make it convenient for your guests, and make sure you’ve reserved a private room if you’re going to break out the naked baby picture slides or karaoke machine.

Rehearsal dinner invitations should go out four weeks before the event and, of course, after the wedding invitation. And never put the rehearsal dinner invite in with the wedding invite! Remember, even though rehearsal dinners are a part of the wedding festivities, they really are two separate events. Formal invitations are perfectly elegant for weddings, but feel free to express your creative side with color and thematic elements for the rehearsal dinner invites.


Jest Gallery - Mountain Lake Lodge

I’m having cake at my reception. Should I really have cake at the rehearsal dinner, too?  The rehearsal dinner gives you a chance to sample other delightful alternatives. Love chocolate? Have a fabulous “All Things Chocolate” Dessert Station which includes every imaginable form of chocolate—ice cream, truffles, mousse parfait, hot chocolate shots and macaroons paired with dark chocolate martinis—even the tabletop surface can be made of chocolate!

You can even arrange to have a snow cone and cotton candy machine.

Terra Steakhouse

Just remember all of your desserts should complement the meal. After a steak dinner lemon is great, but chocolate is best after chicken or light fish. If the meal is very complicated, try a simple dessert of champagne sabayon, fresh berries and pound cake.